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Genie Page 4


  "You have escaped the cats?" asked Harold.

  "For the time being," said Genie. "I greatly underestimated them. They were able to capture and restrain me, and gather much information from me. I gained enough strength from your timely activation of the lamp to at last break their grasp. You have intentionally called me to you?"

  "I seek the optional wish that you mentioned to me," explained Harold.

  "Normally I would wait a week or two before offering it to you," explained the genie. "I expected the lamp you brought with you to merely make it easier to find you at that time. It aids in navigation and has a powerful independent power source."

  "Would you have rather remained a prisoner of the cats?" countered Harold. "Besides, I will be eaten by a giant orange cat tomorrow morning if you do not grant me a wish now."

  "Again there are constraints to your wish, Harold."

  "I remember them," said Harold.

  "This time there are far more. Here's the deal, human. The only wish I can grant you is to return you to the approximate space-time that I removed you from. In other words, I can essentially reverse your first wish. It's that or nothing. Those are the two options. You must decide."

  "There is nothing that I want more than to reverse my first wish!" said Harold. "Would you allow me to first say goodbye to my good friend Ghan? I intend to leave him my suitcase including the lamp, if that is permitted."

  "It is not only permitted, it is required," said Genie, as Harold stepped to Ghan and hugged him with all the strength that he could muster from his tired body, and exchanged good wishes with him. "My struggles with the cats have weakened me. I sense that your struggle with the cats caused you to lose six pounds. That is fortunate, for I should be able to transport both you and the clothing you wear, perhaps even your shoes."

  ****

  Harold was about to inform Genie that he didn't feel very fortunate, when he noticed that he was standing at home in his living room, accompanied only by two of his cats. Wonderfully small and dumb Earthly domestic cats! And he was even wearing his shoes! From their comfortable positions on the sofa, Flip and Cody lifted their heads to look at Harold for a moment before trying to go back to sleep as if everything was perfectly normal.

  Harold didn't let them, he was soon hugging and petting them as he laughed and cried joyfully. The Brothers were annoyed by this odd and untimely behavior by their human, but not annoyed enough to scratch or bite. Harold was soon dashing as fast as his tired body would take him from room to room, calling out the names of his other cats. Of course they didn't come when he called them, but he quickly found all of them; all were in good health and everything seemed normal in the house. He noticed that the litter boxes hadn't been used much. He checked the date and time using his laptop computer and verified that only two hours had elapsed since his first wish took him away to the cat planet! The genie had indeed returned him home as he said that he would!

  Harold showered and put on clean clothes, ate a fabulous Hungry Man frozen dinner, and spent the rest of the day resting and caring for his wonderfully stupid and annoying cats. That night he slept with them around him, sharing and savoring their warmth and companionship. The Brothers slept next to his legs near his feet. Harry and Pricilla slept along his right and left sides, pushing against him in opposite directions. Antsy slept near his head, the most convenient location for frequent petting and scratching, though Harold was occasionally annoyed by her tongue, tail or other body part against his face and by her purring.

  ****

  The next morning the doorbell rang and Harold answered it in his red flannel pajamas and was astonished to discover Ghan, wearing the spare over-sized red flannel pajamas and carrying the old brown suitcase! After exchanging hugs, Harold invited Ghan into his home. There the little brown man was delighted to examine Earth-human living conditions, foods, and tiny pet cats. The television astonished him more than anything else, though he couldn't make head or tails of the commercials. He was particularly interested in books, especially books on science, technology, history, and literature.

  "My wish to the genie was for small dumb cats and Harold Tizard," explained Ghan. "Genie granted my wish in the expected way. My optional wish will unerringly return me home, where another of my people will wish for small dumb cats and Harold Tizard. In that way we plan to acquire many suitcases full of Earth items, perhaps as many as ten or fifteen. It will bring much knowledge and hope to my people. If you agree to help us, of course."

  "Of course I will help you!" said Harold. "I may have to take out a reverse mortgage to pay for the visits, however."

  "Perhaps these would be of help," said Ghan. He handed a handful of glittering crystals to Harold. "We gather them for the cats, who like glittery things. I brought them to pay for books. There is half a suitcase full of them for you."

  "Why these look like gemstones of some kind! Diamonds, rubies, and all sorts of other things, it looks like! Forget about the reverse mortgage, I'll add guest rooms for visitors brought by the genie and some sun-rooms and over-head cat-walks throughout the house for the cats!"

  The next day Ghan was excited to ride with Harold in his old Toyota to town and various stores. Yes, the gems were valuable; a small fraction of them yielded over two-hundred thousand dollars! Harold stocked up on clothes, food, and books for Ghan, and introduced his visitor to pizza and ice cream. Everything astonished Ghan so much that he was almost unable to get through the day. As bright as Ghan was, Earth human civilization was overwhelming.

  After two weeks with Harold, it was time for Ghan to finally return home with a suitcase full of books, chocolate, the genie lamp, and one more thing that Harold thought would be useful: a dozen packets of catnip seeds. "If you want some bat-shit crazy cats, there's nothing better than catnip," explained Harold. "Plant a few fields with catnip seeds and see what chaos happens, but stay away from resulting out of control cats gone crazy on the stuff. I suspect that with enough catnip the kingdom of cats will be shaken up enough to give the humans some interesting opportunities."

  When Genie finally appeared in order to offer the optional wish to Ghan, Ghan was packed and ready to return home. This time the genie was again in the guise of an old Earth human.

  "The two wishes per customer rule was set up to avoid the exploitation of genie wishes such as you have cleverly contrived, Ghan, but I will tolerate your scheme if it serves to confound the nuisance cats of your planet. Had I realized how dangerous the cats were, I would have avoided the planet altogether, Harold. But worlds where there are both intelligent cats and humans are apparently very rare, and there were numerous other things to consider such as similar gravity and atmosphere, a lack of contagious pathogens and toxins, and appropriate temperature."

  "But you didn't notice giant man-eating cats?" asked Harold.

  "But they are intelligent," noted the genie in his defense, with a shrug.

  "But Harold's wish gone badly has been a wonderful miracle for my people," noted Ghan.

  "Will you be able to avoid capture by the great cats this time?" Harold asked Genie.

  "I am confident that I will, Harold. While they were studying me, I was studying them. While I underestimated them, they also greatly underestimated me. Are you ready to reverse your first wish, Ghan? Is that what you still want?"

  "Yes, I wish to return to my home-world, great genie of the lamp!" Ghan said, though his eyes were full of tears when he said it.

  Harold waved goodbye to his courageous friend, his eyes also full of tears. Earth was like heaven to Ghan, but he had to return to his people in hell to help them. Maybe with the hard work of heroes like Ghan and a little help from Harold and the genie within only a few more generations humans would be free of the tyranny of the great cats.

  With that Ghan and the genie disappeared.

  Harold was again for the time being left alone in heaven on Earth with his wonderfully dumb cats, which was fine with him.

  The End

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>   About Other Publications by This Author

  You may also be interested in the already published full-length e-books of this author, including a diverse collection of twenty fantasy and sci-fi short stories titled There Goes The Neighborhood; Earthly Fantasy/Science Fiction Short Stories. Like my novels, these short stories range from pure science fiction to pure fantasy, and most take place in contemporary Earth settings.

  If you like ancient secrets, magic and science, romance and adventure, science fiction and fantasy, parallel universes and hidden fantasy worlds, try reading the full-length novels Secrets of Goth Mountain (which like the second Global Warming Fun story/ novella has a Native American setting) and its loosely coupled epic fun-packed sequel Government Men. Government Men has a bit of everything, including the book itself and its author. Yes, oddly enough the book includes itself and the author (look for the anagram), along with unicorns, psychics, space aliens, an impending Armageddon, and much more! Both of these action filled books employ a great deal of science-based fiction, as well as strong doses of fantasy and romance.

  Bird lovers that like strong human female heroines, stronger blue jay heroes, and T-rex sized raptors may enjoy an adventure trip to Aves the bird planet, achieved by reading the traditional science fiction thriller Blue Dawn Jay of Aves. Other than many of my short stories and much of Global Warming Fun, this is my most 'pure' science fiction work to date.

  Global Warming Fun is a series of short stories, novellas, and novels that uses climate change as a backdrop for the centuries-long life of telepathist Ed Rumsfeld and the emergence of sentient ants and ancient stone creatures that are based on the Mohawk myth of stone-coat giants. Find out where Global Warming is headed!

  Fantasy noir detective fans that can abide what used to be known by feminists as a 'male chauvinist pig' private detective as a hero, and can also tolerate trolls, elves, and other unexpected visitors to our world along with a talking mob cat, may enjoy The Shrinking Nuts Case, a novel length 'pure' fantasy work.

  White Dragon's Chosen and Apprentice Wizards of Hope are contemporary fantasy adventure novels that tell of teens with psychic/wizardly powers that face deadly dangers.

  I try to employ some humor in most of my works, particularly in Government Men, The Shrinking Nuts Case, and many of my short stories. I also lean heavily towards positive outcomes, although just as in real life, those don't always happen.

  To learn the author's world view including thoughts on multiverse and quantum mechanics physics concepts and how that compares with phenomena that occur in the above novels, get geeky with the brief little e-book NOW and the Weltanschauung of Government Men.

  All are available where you found this e-book.

  Enjoy!

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